Man and Yoda go on great journey

Associated Press

Posted on Wed, Jan. 31, 2007

GARDEN CITY, Utah - Joined by his dog Yoda, Paul Woods travels by day and sleeps in a tent at night. His vehicle: a riding mower.

The Herald Journal of Logan caught up with Woods in the parking lot of Beaver Mountain ski resort, 107 miles north of Salt Lake City, near the Idaho border.

Woods' ultimate destination is Virginia, where he claims his late mother left him a house. He said he took care of her in Alaska until her death.

Woods said he left Alaska in 2005 and has been riding his mower or getting rides from sympathetic pickup drivers who hoist his vehicle in the back of the truck.

The mower's maximum speed is 15 mph, but it's weighted down by tools, dog snacks and the dog itself.

"I've spent more time fixing it than driving it," Woods said.

The president of Beaver Mountain lodge, Ted Seeholzer, said it took Woods two days to drive 27 miles up U.S. 89 to reach the resort.

He spent two nights in a tent in the parking lot. Employees gave him a power cord so he could watch the 1971 movie "Billy Jack" on a portable DVD player.

"He bummed some tools, bought some gas and food," Seeholzer said by phone Wednesday. "He talked to everybody in the place, walked in like he was part of the company."

Woods departed Wednesday for the next town on U.S. 89, Garden City. The cold, windy canyon doesn't bother him.

"This is not cold," he told the Herald Journal. "Alaska can be cold. ... You have to wear goggles or your eyeballs will freeze."

Estimates have him arriving in 2010 at his inherited house.

"Yoda doesn't mind, so neither do I", said Woods.

Man drives SUV onto iced river to do "doughnuts"

Posted on Tue, Jan. 30, 2007

Associated Press

CEDAR RAPIDS, Iowa - A man was charged with drunken driving after officials say he drove his vehicle onto the ice-covered Mississippi River near Sabula.

Steven A. Parker, 51, is accused of driving his sports utility vehicle off a boat ramp to do "doughnuts" on Sunday when the ice broke and his vehicle fell through, about 30 feet from shore, said officials with the Iowa Department of Natural Resources.

Parker and his son, Steven A. Parker, Jr., 28, of Waynesville, N.C., were able to escape but needed treatmeant for exhaustion and hypothermia.

Parker is charged with third-offense drunken driving and driving with a revoked license.

"It seemed like a good idea at the time", Parker said.

Bears helmet breaks on statue of lion

Posted on Tue, Jan. 30, 2007

DON BABWIN / Associated Press

CHICAGO - An effort to honor the NFC Champion Chicago Bears hit a snag Tuesday morning when a huge football helmet broke as it was being placed on one of the lion statues that stands guard outside the Art Institute of Chicago.

Fans and officials leaped for their lives as the enormous helmet came crashing to the ground to bounce and roll twenty yards.

It seems the frigid weather, often referred to as Bears weather in Chicago, may have been to blame.

Nobody was injured and the assembled crowd quickly regained their high spirits with a collection of flasks they had brought along.

Some theorize the broken helmet had nothing to do with the weather at all.

Heitz said workers took the fiberglass helmets back to their workshop, where they will be enlarged and refinished in time to place them on the lions on Wednesday.

One man, however, did not find the accident amusing.

"I looked away from the ceremony for a moment then heard an enormous crash and saw a giant object bouncing towards me", said Chicago-native Russ Jenson.

"I leaped aside just in time but landed face first in a pool of sludge. Then as I got up I heard someone say that I looked like Indiana Jones- except for the part about being covered in sludge. I was so embarrassed and angry that i ripped up the two Super Bowl tickets i had been carrying in my vest pocket."

"Do you know anyone who's selling their tickets?", added Jenson hopefully.

Man to swim Amazon

13:51 Thursday 1st February 2007

A swimmer is in training to become the first person to swim the entire length of the Amazon.

Martin Strel already features in the Guinness Book of World Records for swimming the Danube, Yangtze and Mississippi rivers.

Mr Strel, 52, from Slovenia, acknowledged there were risks lying beneath the water but said that it was his dream.

According to the BBC he said: "I'm concerned of course, but if I think of that stuff I would never jump into the water."

More than 45 people, including doctors and trainers, will accompany him through Peru and Brazil.

He plans to finish his 3,375 mile-swim in 70 days, averaging about 85km a day.

Ex-citizen of year pleads guilty

Associated Press

BRENTWOOD, N.H. - The former Citizen of the Year in Derry pleaded guilty Friday to stealing more than $250,000 from the nonprofit agency she led.

Police accused former Derry Economic Development Corporation chief Cheryl Crawford, 58, of taking the money and gambling it away on the Internet. She also stole from the Derry Depot Square Holdings, a subsidiary for the economic development agency.

Crawford faces up to 10 years at the New Hampshire State Prison. She also must repay the agency and spend 100 hours talking to the public about the dangers of gambling.

Wis. police chief tickets himself $235

Posted on Sat, Feb. 03, 2007

Associated Press

KEWASKUM, Wis. - Police Chief Richard Knoebel says he wasn't about to take the easy way out when he accidentally drove past a stopped school bus with its emergency lights flashing.

For violating traffic laws, Knoebel wrote himself a ticket for $235, docked himself four points on his driving record and paid the fine the next day.

It happened in September but didn't make news until after the fine appeared in court records and was reported by a West Bend newspaper.

Knoebel says he doesn't mind getting the belated attention, if it serves to raise awareness.

"If it brings notice to people that they should be stopping for school buses, I don't mind the notoriety," he said.

He said he was on patrol on four-lane U.S. 45 when he was distracted by a stopped dump truck. He saw a car coming from behind and thought it might hit the truck, so he moved to pass the truck before he saw the stopped school bus in the far lane.

He said he didn't realize he had passed the bus until it was too late.

Gambler gives birth on N.J. casino floor

Posted on Mon, Feb. 05, 2007

Associated Press

ATLANTIC CITY, N.J. - A woman playing the penny slots Saturday morning left the Resorts Atlantic City casino with her own little jackpot - a new baby boy.

Eight-months pregnant Nyree Thompson, 32, went into labor on the casino floor about 9:30 a.m.

Thompson said she mistook labor pains for gas at first, but after going to the restroom told a security guard that she might be giving birth.

Thompson said the guard thought she was joking. Then her water broke.

"A guard came over and said, 'Don't push,'" Thompson said. "I said, 'Forget you, this baby is coming right now!'"

Minutes later, a boy weighing less than 5 pounds was born. Thompson named him Qualeem.

Four security guards helped Thompson deliver the baby, wrapping the child in a jacket until paramedics arrived at about 9:40 a.m., said Steve Callender, vice president of operations at Resorts.

Despite being premature, Qualeem was doing fine.

Unbelievably, Thompsan wanted to resume gambling afterwards and had to be persuaded by casino officials to go to the hospital for tests and medical care. Thompsan was angry but had little choice since they refused to let her continue gambling.

Truck spills 40 tons of cow intestines

Associated Press

Posted on Sat, Feb. 10, 2007

SHEBOYGAN, Wis. - About 40 tons of cow intestines and bones spilled onto a major highway after a truck driver became distracted by his digital music player and his semitrailer tipped over, officials said.

Authorities closed parts of Interstate 43 for about two hours Thursday while the slippery mess was cleaned up, said sheriff's Sgt. Blaine Spicer.

The accident happened in the town of Mosel when 25-year-old Ryan Engle's truck veered off the road as he adjusted his MP3 player, Spicer said.

Engle, of Kenosha, was cited for inattentive driving and taken to a hospital with non-life threatening injuries, Spicer said.

The truck had to be towed from the scene. It is owned by Birchwood Transport of Kenosha.

The cleanup job was originally estimated at only 30 minutes, but so many workers became nauseous that the affair stretched into hours as the mess began to smell. Several of the cleanup workers slipped and fell into the cow guts and had to be sent home.

Bears fan loses bet and must change name

Associated Press

DECATUR, Ill. - Scott Wiese, a die-hard Chicago Bears fan, will legally change his name to that of Indianapolis Colts quarterback Peyton Manning after signing a pledge in front of a crowd at a Decatur bar last Friday night. He vowed to adopt Manning's name if the Bears lost Sunday's Super Bowl.

The final score was Colts 29, Bears 17.

So on Tuesday, Wiese went to the Macon County Courts Facility and started the process of changing his name.

"I made the bet, and now I've got to keep it," said the 26-year-old, who lives in Forsyth, just north of Decatur.

Wiese will now have to advertise his intention in the local newspaper - the Herald & Review - for several weeks and then have a judge give him the OK to become, legally anyway, Peyton Manning.

The men have little in common, Wiese acknowledges.

Manning the quarterback is 30 years old, stands 6-foot-5 and has a contract with the Colts worth more than $100 million.

Wiese is 5-foot-11 and works at a Staples office-supply store for somewhat less.

"I think I kind of represent all Bears fans," he said. "Not that I'm saying they're all idiots like me, but I represent their passion because I really care about my team, you know?"

While he pledged to take on the new identity, Wiese didn't make any promises about how long he would keep it.

Posted on Tue, Feb. 13, 2007

Connecticut man busted twice for drugs

Associated Press

SOUTHBURY, Conn. - A Danbury man's plans to bail himself out after a drug bust went more than a bit awry over the weekend. State police said that a small safe that Nakia Davis, 32, had his aunt bring in to the Southbury barracks not only contained $5,000 in cash for bail, but also drug paraphernalia and 16 grams of cocaine, leading to more charges.

Davis had been pulled over for speeding on Interstate 84 in Southbury. With the help of a police dog, marijuana was seized from the car, and police found 43 baggies of cocaine weighing 48 grams when they patted Davis down, police said.

Davis arranged for his aunt to bring a small safe which Davis claimed contained money for his bail.

State police said when Davis' aunt opened the safe in front of a state police trooper, inside was the cash, but also drug paraphernalia and 16 grams of cocaine.

Additional drug charges were filed against Davis and his bond was increased to $125,000. He was later bailed out by another relative.

Posted on Wed, Feb. 14, 2007

N.M. orders 500 talking urinal cakes

Associated Press

SANTA FE, N.M. - New Mexico is taking its fight against drunken driving to men's restrooms around the state. The state has ordered 500 talking urinal cakes that will deliver a recorded anti-DWI message to bar and restaurant patrons who make one last pit stop before getting behind the wheel.

"Hey there, big guy. Having a few drinks?" a female voice says a few seconds after an approaching male sets off a motion sensor in the device. "It's time to call a cab or ask a sober friend for a ride home."

Transportation Department spokesman S.U. Mahesh said the urinal cakes are a way to reach one group that's a target of state safety campaigns. Men commit about three times as many drunken-driving infractions as women.

The devices, manufactured by New York-based Healthquest Technologies Inc., were invented by Richard Deutsch. He said there's no other device like it on the market.

"The idea is based on the concept that there is no more captive audience than a guy standing at a urinal," Deutsch said. "You can't look right and you can't look left; you've got to look at the ad."

Public awareness campaigns in New York, Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Minnesota and Australia have used the devices, as have commercial advertisers.

In New Mexico, the device uses the state DWI slogan "You drink, you drive, you lose."

Some Albuquerque bars installed the devices this week, and the state plans to distribute them to Santa Fe bars and restaurants as well as establishments in Farmington, Gallup and Las Cruces.

The state spent $21 for each talking urinal cake for the pilot program but will ask bars and restaurants to pay for future orders if the idea catch on, Mahesh said.

The cakes have enough battery power to last about three months.

Posted on Thu, Feb. 15, 2007

Turtle eaten by golden retriever lives

Associated Press

BRANDON, Fla. - A palm-sized pet turtle and the golden retriever that gobbled it up survived the misadventure thanks to the quick actions of a 12-year-old girl, a veterinarian said.

The saga of Pepper the red-eared slider turtle and Bella the golden retriever started last week. Shelby Terihay, 12, moved her pet pond turtles indoors to protect them from a cold snap - a plan that worked well until Bella found some of the turtles in a bathtub, The Tampa Tribune reported.

A quick headcount confirmed Bella had swallowed one of the turtles. Shelby insisted on a rescue mission and, on the advice of a vet, her parents made Bella vomit. Out came Pepper, still alive despite a shattered shell and an estimated 10 minutes inside Bella's belly.

"This was definitely a first for me," veterinarian David Thomassy said.

Thomassy patched up Pepper's shell and credited Shelby with saving Bella, too.

"The turtle would definitely have caused an obstruction," Thomassy said. "Without cutting it out directly, it eventually would have killed the dog."

Posted on Thu, Feb. 15, 2007

Newborn ends up in Pa. woman's pant leg

Associated Press

CONNELLSVILLE, Pa. - A woman gave birth to a boy outside a western Pennsylvania hospital, a delivery that happened so quickly that the infant wound up in the woman's pants.

"It happened so fast," Rebecca Johnson, 24, told the Daily Courier in Connellsville. "I didn't know what happened until he was in my pant leg."

Johnson had just gotten out of the car at Highlands Hospital in Connellsville and was still in the parking lot when her 5-pound, 15-ounce son, Mason Matthew Parkinson, arrived Wednesday.

An emergency room physician cut the umbilical cord in the parking lot, and doctors attended to Johnson until she could be taken to Uniontown Hospital, which has a maternity unit.

Mason, Johnson's fourth child, was doing well.

Posted on Thu, Feb. 15, 2007

SWAT team wakes suspect after standoff

Associated Press

WALHALLA, S.C. - Justin Stasney might have had a good reason for not responding to officers who surrounded his home. He was asleep in a recliner when the SWAT team found him after a four-hour standoff, authorities said. "He did not know we were there until we put our hands on him," Oconee County Sheriff's Capt. Steve Jenkins said.

Stasney, 26, ran his mother from their home Tuesday night by firing several shots, deputies said.

Officers surrounding the home first heard breaking glass and other noise, but then heard nothing from Stasney despite making calls on a telephone they were able to get into the house and talking to him over a patrol car's loudspeaker, authorities said.

A second SWAT team went around the back of the house after about four hours and saw Stasney asleep in a chair, Jenkins said.

Officers entered stealthily and woke Stasney up to arrest him. He's been charged with discharging a firearm into a residence, but could face additional charges, Jenkins said.

No one was injured, but the home had bullet holes in the walls and ceiling, Jenkins said.

Deputies said they recovered about 15 guns in the house.

Back garden burials

09:45 Monday 12th February 2007

A Serbian man wants to turn his home into a church because so many of his neighbours and
friends are buried in his back garden

Dragan Djordjevic, 53, from the southern village of Grbavce, applied for permission to register his garden as a cemetery so his mother could be buried there when she died ten years ago.

He said: "The nearest cemetery was too far away. I thought if I buried her in the back garden I could visit her grave more often, and save time.

"Then a neighbour asked if they could bury a relative there as I had permission, and now I have 70 neighbours and friends in my back garden."

He said he has now applied for permission to turn the house into a church, daily newspaper Glas Javnosti reported.

Divorce over pumpkin pie

10:25 Friday 9th February 2007

A Russian man divorced his wife of 18 years after finding she had been feeding him cheap pumpkins instead of more expensive courgette squashes.

Ivan Dimitrov, 47, was devastated to find the pies he had been eating for six months were made of pumpkins and not courgettes.

Mr Dimitrov, from Voronezh, said when he realised the truth, after finding pumpkin rinds in the bin, he immediately hired a lawyer to organise a quick divorce from wife Irena, 38.

He said: "She knows I absolutely hate pumpkins and she lied to me for months about it just because the pumpkins were cheap.

"What else has she been lying about? What man could trust a woman who fed him pumpkins for half a year?"

Posted on Wed, Feb. 21, 2007

Customers get billion-dollar power bills

Associated Press

WEATHERFORD, Texas - Perhaps his $24 billion electric bill will teach Richard Redden not to leave the heat running. Thanks to a printing error, Redden and more than 1,300 Weatherford utility customers this week received billion-dollar electric bills marked as late notices.

Irving-bases DataProse, which prints customer bills for Weatherford Electric, said the company was embarrassed by the error.

"Obviously, this is not something we are pleased about," said Curtis Nelson, DataProse vice president and general manager.

Weatherford Electric spokeswoman Pam Pearson said outraged customers can expect their correct bills later this month and need not continue the barrage of hostile phone calls and emails. She said the company's records were correct and showed the right balances.

"I know they raised the rates on kilowatt hours a little bit," Redden said. "I guess we shouldn't have run the heater quite so much this month."

Posted on Wed, Feb. 21, 2007

Porn DVD screams prompt sword 'rescue'

Associated Press

OCONOMOWOC, Wis. - A man says he broke into an apartment with a cavalry sword because he thought he heard a woman being raped, but the sound actually was from a pornographic movie his upstairs neighbor was watching.

"Now I feel stupid," said James Van Iveren, who has been charged in the case. "This really is nothing, nothing but a mistake."

According to a criminal complaint, the neighbor told police that Van Iveren pounded on the door and kicked it open without warning Feb. 12, damaging the frame and lock.

"Where is she?" Van Iveren demanded, thrusting the sword at the neighbor, the complaint said. "Where is she?"

The neighbor told police Van Iveren became increasingly aggressive as he repeated the question, insisting that he had heard a woman being raped. The complaint said that, with the sword pointed at him, the neighbor led Van Iveren throughout the apartment, opening closet doors to prove he was alone.

The neighbor later played for police the part of the DVD he believed Van Iveren heard downstairs.

Van Iveren, 39, of Oconomowoc, was charged with criminal trespass, criminal damage and disorderly conduct, all while using a dangerous weapon, and is due in court March 5. Together, the misdemeanor counts carry a maximum sentence of 33 months in jail.

Van Iveren said Tuesday that he heard a woman "screaming for help," grabbed the sword, bounded up the stairs, kicked in the apartment door and confronted the man who lived there.

"I intended to hold it behind my back and knock politely. But I froze and instead, what happened happened," he told the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel.

Contesting his neighbor's account, Van Iveren said he didn't look anywhere in the apartment except the front room, and that he never threatened the neighbor with the sword.

"I had the sword extended. But that was all," he said.

Van Iveren, who lives with his mother in the downstairs apartment, said he did not call police when he heard the noises because he does not have a telephone. He said he barely knew the upstairs tenant.

Police seized Van Iveren's sword, which he said was a family heirloom.

Posted on Thu, Feb. 22, 2007

Man compacted in trash truck

Associated Press

KANSAS CITY, Mo. - A man sleeping in a trash receptacle was injured Thursday after being dumped into a trash truck and then compacted. The extent of the man's injuries is not clear, said Joe Vitale, battalion chief with the Kansas City Fire Department.

The incident happened early Thursday at a shopping center on U.S. 40, east of downtown Kansas City. As the waste-truck worker was driving away, he started the compacter. The driver heard screams coming from the front of truck, where he had dumped trash from the receptacle, Vitale said.

Tom Coffman, spokesman with the waste company, Deffenbaugh Disposal Service, said the driver quickly stopped the compactor.

"He jumped in and tried to dig the guy out, and found out he couldn't," Coffman said.

A file cabinet in the trash heap had pressed against the man's legs.

The driver called 911 and firefighters arrived and rescued the unidentified man.

Coffman said the man was lifted over the top of the truck and then dropped 12 to 15 feet from the receptacle to the truck. The compactor has a pressure level of about 2,000 pounds per square inch.

Posted on Fri, Feb. 23, 2007

Rats run wild in KFC-Taco Bell in N.Y.

VERENA DOBNIK / Associated Press

NEW YORK - A dozen rats were caught on video scurrying around the floor of a New York City KFC/Taco Bell restaurant early Friday, running between counters and tables and climbing on children's high chairs.

News crews flocked to the windows of the Greenwich Village neighborhood restaurant, which hadn't opened for the day. By midmorning, the footage was all over the Internet and television news shows, with onlookers giving a play-by-play from the sidewalk as the rodents moved about.

"He's coming for his close-up," one bystander said as a rat came near the window.

Employees came to work, but no customers were allowed in as health inspectors arrived.

There was no answer at the phone number displayed in neon on the store window below the words "We Deliver."

"This is completely unacceptable and is an absolute violation of our high standards," KFC and Taco Bell said in a statement. "This restaurant has been closed and we are addressing the issue with the franchise owner. We will not allow this store to reopen until is it completely resanitized and given a clean bill of health."

The chains said construction in the basement on Thursday "temporarily escalated the situation."

The city Department of Health had inspectors at the site on Friday, said department spokeswoman Sara Markt. She said the restaurant had passed inspection in December, but a violation was issued to the restaurant owner about "evidence of rats" - which meant only droppings at the time.

Markt said the owner of the franchise is listed with the department as ADF Fifth Operating Corp.

Rats have long been a problem in New York City, with such a dense population and such a large and readily available food supply for the rodents. They are frequently scampering through subway tunnels, rooting through trash, dashing across parks and burrowing into the walls of apartment buildings.

But it is rare to see so many rats congregating in one place in such public view.

Yum Brands Inc., based in Louisville, Ky., owns the Taco Bell and KFC restaurant chains.

Last week, it was reported that Taco Bell sales had slumped after a widely publicized E. coli scare, but that international sales helped Yum Brands in the company's fourth quarter.

The E. coli outbreak late last year caused more than 70 Taco Bell customers to become ill. Federal officials said in December that the most likely source of the illnesses was lettuce. Taco Bell took precautions by changing its suppliers of lettuce and cheese in New York, New Jersey, Pennsylvania and Delaware.

Woman finds WWII grenade in sack of potatoes

Wed Feb 28, 5:45 PM ET

ROME - A woman in a town near Naples got an unwelcome surprise when she bought a sack of potatoes at a nearby market, put them into water to peel and discovered one of them was a hand grenade apparently left over from World War II.

Olga Mauriello had put the potatoes in a vat of water and had just begun peeling them Tuesday when she found the explosive, covered in dirt, police said Wednesday.

An alarmed Mauriello, 74, called neighbors, who in turn called police.

Officers detonated the grenade in a park on Wednesday, state police said.

The grenade was believed to have traveled with the potatoes from France, the ANSA news agency reported.

"my husband likes spicy food, but this is ridiculous" Mauriello said.

Posted on Wed, Mar. 14, 2007

Hard-core porn interrupts news show

Associated Press

MESA, Ariz. - A cable news program was temporarily replaced with hard-core pornography, shocking viewers who had been watching a health show featuring former NBC News anchor Tom Brokaw. The incident Monday night on KPPX-TV was "an act of human sabotage" at the Phoenix-area station, said ION Television, which operates the station.

"We have launched a rigorous investigation, and any implicated employees will face strict disciplinary action and termination," ION Media Networks spokeswoman Leslie Monreal said in a statement.

Brenda Schodt, of Chandler, said she was shocked to look up and see graphic sex acts on her television screen.

"Maybe five or 10 minutes into the show there was no volume," Schodt said. "I thought it was the TV, but when I looked up, there were these images."

ION Television, based in West Palm Beach, Fla., declined to say whether the pornography aired beyond the Phoenix market.

Posted on Thu, Mar. 15, 2007

Malaysian police detain 'midget' gang

Associated Press

KUALA LUMPUR, Malaysia - Malaysian police detained an eight-member gang of small-sized robbers dubbed the "midget gang," who allegedly confessed to committing 14 break-ins over the past three months, a news report said Thursday.

All the gang members, aged between 14 and 23 years, were diminutive, The Star newspaper said without saying whether they were dwarfs or just small.

Some of them who were less than 5 feet tall would be picked to squeeze through small openings into the houses they robbed in central Malaysia, The Star said.

Gang members confessed to their crimes when they were detained, according to the report.

The arrests came about after residents in a housing area alerted police after noticing the group loitering suspiciously in a field near their homes, Ampang district police chief Amer Awal was quoted as saying.

Amer and other senior officers were in a meeting Thursday morning and were unable to take phone calls to provide further details, his secretary said.

Ant saves man's life

May 25, 2007

Associated Press

Miami, Florida- Resident Dale Strummond was seemingly warned from drinking a cyanide-laced beverage by an ant.

Strummond had stopped by a latin market to buy himself a bottle of soda and a sandwich to take to a local park.

"I opened the soda then set it down for a second while I started eating. Then as i picked up the bottle to drink i noticed an ant had crawled up the side. I can't explain why, but i decided to let the ant have a drink first."

"I'm sure glad i did because he curled up into a little ball a moment after taking a sip."

Lab tests showed that the bottle of Sinchi Roca soda contained traces of cyanide, possibly added by a disgruntled factory worked in South America. A mass recall of the brand took place immediately but test results found no further contamination.

Man says salad stolen from refrigerator

Tue Jun 19, 4:46 PM ET

SOMERSET, Pa. - Someone kicked in the door of a man's apartment, stuck a knife in the door and took a chilled salad from his refrigerator.

Somerset police said the man reported the bizarre burglary on Monday. He told investigators someone broke into his apartment while he went to a nearby tavern. Nothing but the salad was missing, police said.

Police said they have a suspect and expect to file charges once they finish their investigation.

Rats! Look who's getting tipsy in India

Wed Jun 20, 4:05 AM ET

PATNA, India (Reuters) - Rats are gnawing at beer cans and making holes in caps of whisky bottles stored in police storehouses in eastern India and apparently getting drunk, authorities said on Wednesday.

The rodents' love for liquor has the police department in Bihar state stumped as it tries to store hundreds of bottles seized from illegal sellers from across the state in Patna, the state capital, said Kundan Krishnan, a senior officer.

"We are fed up with these drunk rats and cannot explain why they have suddenly turned to consumption of alcohol," he said.

The problem costs revenue as the seized liquor is usually sold through auctions, he said.

Rats were also attacking people near the police buildings, nibbling at their toes and acting strangely.

Posted on Fri, Jun. 22, 2007

Black Lab Drives Owner's Car Into River

The Associated Press

SAGLE, Idaho - Bad dog. Charlie the black lab drove his owner's car into the Pend Oreille River. As Mark Ewing walked home Wednesday evening after returning from picking up a pizza, Charlie jumped into the car through an open window, and apparently knocked the vehicle into gear.

"He somehow got the car into neutral," Ewing said. "My car just went boom, down an incline and into the drink."

Ewing could only watch as his Chevy Impala sank into the river. No dummy, Charlie jumped out of the window as the car went downhill.

"There's nothing weirder than looking at your car cruising down your driveway when you're not in it and seeing your dog at the wheel," Ewing said.

Actually, things got a little weirder when the tow truck driver showed up.

Before the driver dove into the water to hook the car up to his truck, he asked Ewing to hold his dentures.

"My car's in the drink, I've got dentures in my hand and this guy Keith ... goes swimming," Ewing noted.

Prison food too good to leave

09:31 Friday 22nd June 2007

Inmates of an Indian prison are reportedly refusing to apply for bail because the food is so good.

Parappana Agrahara prison in Bangalore is crowded with 4,700 inmates, more than twice its capacity.

Criminals are refusing to apply for bail to get out while juvenile offenders are lying about their age to get in, reports the Bangalore Mirror.

The paper says the reason is healthy food being served by ISKCON, or the International Society for Krishna Consciousness, a Hindu evangelist organisation.

ISKCON, commonly known as the Hare Krishna movement, started serving its pure-vegetarian fare in the jail in May under contract from the prisons department.

Lunch and dinner typically include piping hot rice, two vegetables and a spicy lentil dish called sambar and buttermilk.

A dessert is added on festival days and national holidays like Independence Day, and also once a week.

Prisoner Raja Reddy, who has been arrested 20 times in 30 years for theft, robbery and burglary, said: "When we are getting tasty, nutritious food three times a day here, why should we go out and commit crimes."

Drunk woman falls in concrete mixer

10:55 Wednesday 20th June 2007

A drunk Russian woman had to be pulled out of a newly-laid road after she fell into a concrete mixer and then into a pool of drying asphalt.

Elena Pavlovna, 43, had been walking home after a lunchtime session with pals in the town of Kemerovo.

She saw her path was blocked by machinery left by workers who were taking a break from resurfacing a road and tried to step over the machinery.

But she slipped and fell into a concrete mixer which had been left on and after a few minutes of being twirled around inside with the concrete mix she was "poured" out onto a pool of asphalt.

As she struggled to get out of the asphalt mix she slipped further into it until only her head was sticking out. She was pulled out by rescue workers who were called by workmen when they came back from their break.

A rescue service spokesman said: "'Despite the fact that only part of her mouth was out in the open she did not shut up and kept on telling us what we should be doing. It was really annoying."

Hares close airport

09:09 Monday 18th June 2007



Flights have been suspended because a plague of hares caused Linate airport, Milan, to close for security reasons.

The animals invaded the runways at Milan's Linate Airport - and affected the operation of vital equipment.

Airport bosses are baffled as to why the hare population at Linate has exploded in the past few months, reports the BBC.

The hares confuse the ground radar that is meant to prevent a repeat of Italy's worst ever air crash, which left 118 people dead, at Linate in 2001.

Officials closed Linate for three hours while a team of 30 local wildlife experts tried to catch the 80 or so hares that have been causing the problem.

"People and hares were running back and forth over the concourse for hours and the job still isn't done", said an airport official speaking anonymously. "It's been complete chaos and we're no closer to solving this problem."

Holy shit, too long to read in one sitting.

...and i can think of nothing to say.

lol, i just did... but then again, i AM known for my endurance... lol

But the white text on the black background is hell on the eyes.